


One Little Problem

by JoAsakura



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Brotp, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-20
Updated: 2014-11-20
Packaged: 2018-02-26 08:35:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2645261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoAsakura/pseuds/JoAsakura
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I love Krem and Bull's banter :D</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Little Problem

Haven: A frostbitten pimple on the ass-end of nowhere.

Krem sighed as he watched the barkeep pour out another round of watered-down wine. The Chargers were used to better fare, but as he picked up the mugs, he supposed he couldn't complain too much. Haven's resources were limited, and as things were at the moment, it was probably for the best that the boss was sober.

He set the mugs down on the table and scowled at the massive qunari who was currently in the process of staring at absolutely nothing. "Oh Andraste's Flaming Asshole, no." He said, rapping on the Bull's skull with his armoured knuckles. "I know that look."

Bull took his mug and looked around dramatically. "I swear I just heard the irritating call of the Greater Northern Tevinter Jackass Bird." He rumbled before taking a sip with a wince.

Krem sat down heavily beside him. "That look on your big stupid face is the same one you had when I had to fish your big, stupid ox ass out of that big stupid reservoir in Val Royeaux last year." He sat back. "Remember? When that Chevalier's pack of trained dogs chased you naked through the streets because you pissed off his mistress?"

"Spicy." Bull said with a widening grin. "She was only mad because she caught me with the Chevalier himself. Both of them..."

"Redheads." Krem finished, jabbing Bull with his finger. "And don't think I haven't noticed a certain rusty hue to our admittedly handsome Herald's curls. And don't think I didn't notice you doing that head dip-tilt... thing every time you talk to him. Like when you were telling him about your drama-free qunari sex doctors?"

"It's barely a movement at all!" Bull had the good graces to look affronted.

"YOUR HORNS ARE LIKE THREE FEET ACROSS." Krem gestured expansively, watery wine sloshing in his mug. "EVERYONE CAN SEE IT."

"You're not the boss of me." The qunari sulked. "I just think red hair is... nice."

"Admitting you have a problem is the first step." Krem said smugly. The wine was garbage, but the look on his commander's face was priceless.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [One Little Problem [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3582870) by [Opalsong](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Opalsong/pseuds/Opalsong)




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